Part One
Like you ready for this roller coaster sucker :) So without further ado here are 20 tips I feel are extremely necessary for college survival. College overall is about balance. You CAN get good grades. You can TURN up. And you WILL graduate. You just have to have your priorities lined up and allocate your time properly....
1) Recreate yourself- People are always talking about staying true to yourself and how you're fake if you change or "switch up." But how will you ever know who you truly are, what you like, your style... if you never mix it up and explore new options. I think humans should exist as constantly evolving people to reach their peaks. Evolving comes from the word evolution, and evolution means changing/ growing. Think of yourself coming into a college in a cocoon. By the end of your college career you should become a beautiful butterfly. One filled with different colors (experiences), and ready to fly into the world. So if you were shy and "nerdy" in high school, you can start over and be outgoing. If you were loud and obnoxious a year ago, you can tone it down and be a bit more observant. If you weren't involved and really weren't in the social mix, come to college and TAKE OVER. The point is BE who YOU want to BE. Change your appearance, be risky, or don't change anything at all. The point is, don't limit yourself.
2) Join organizations and Network: I included both of these tips together because I believe one produces the other. If you are involved, you will meet likeminded people and also different people. You will meet people who can and are willing to help you get to where you are. So join organizations and really get familiar with your school. Think about all the money you give your college... might as well utilize it and actually use the resources. What if you don't know how to join an org or what org to join? Get your feet wet. Join something within your major and see how that goes. If you don't like that, try something that you are interested in. Join the fashion org, campus planning org, or something related to your ethnicity. There are Black Student Unions at PWIs and almost always a diversity office. Being involved helps you meet friends and makes college a much better experience. It also make you well rounded and very marketable in the future. As far as networking... it is free game for all. Some people will complain about not having a seat at the table or not being as connected as the next. But if you want something bad, you will GO and GET it. Period. So if you want a voice at the table (figuratively speaking), pull one up. If you want to be connected to the leaders on your campus, do it. Get out of your comfort zone and do things you have never done before. Shake hands and sit with people you never imagined being in contact with. Ask about opportunities, send your resume to that employer/ internship. If you have an adviser or friend who is well connected, tell them throw you down! Just be willing to put in the hard work because nothing easy is given.
3)Be Frugal: Now I know we all joke about the struggles of being a broke college students and living check to check, or dollar to dollar that your parents live. And although it is a somewhat toxic thrill we joke about, it is really not the life to live. Be frugal. What does that mean? LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS. When you are in college, like in high school you will always see somebody with something new. But guess what, that aint none of your business. As my parents say, you need to be focused on that degree, everything else is EXTRA. Does that mean you have to miss out and go without? Not all the time. Let's say you there's is a big game coming up and you know the tailgate gone be fye. For my girls, all the trades going to be in town. And for my dudes, all the ______, going be on you. So you know you got to be on the scene right? Of course. So if you know this is going to be an event packed weekend...budget your money accordingly. If you want to drink, party, and look fly... something gotta give. So if you know you want to go out all weekend, you DO NOT need to be in the mall. What fun is it to have a great weekend and be broke the Sunday after waiting two weeks for a check, or for your parents to show love to your account. And then if you must live that life or you know you just got to spend a massive amount of money, count the cost. Know that you are going to have to eat that cafe food and DB because you spent your money elsewhere. When I get money, I write down all my necessities and then see what I have left to spend leisurely. I am literally a work in progress because I am the queen of spending before I get. I will calculate my purchases before my check even drops.... but I am evolving. Also, learn the cheap spots and the places that give student discounts in your new city. When grocery shopping buy your essentials from the Dollar Tree and Dollar General. Some people may turn their nose up at this, but you can't be bougie and broke. Learn how to ball on a budget, finesse that clearance rack, thrift and create your OWN style. College is not a popularity contest, I promise everyone is literally on their own kick. Do you do boo.
4) Take your first two years VERY seriously: You should be giving 110 in every class, and every semester. And in a perfect world doing this would grant you a 4.0. But college is NOT a perfect experience and everyone will have a different outcome. But if you go hard those first two years and really get some solid A's and B's... I promise you will have a cushion. This is when your GPA can increase/ decrease greatly. Everybody wants to have a good time, but you have to keep your priorities in order. Some of us (myself) can fool around and then refocus and make a comeback. But that also is not the way to live. I had a great time my freshmen year, but sure did cry when everything hit the fan it and was obvious I wasn't taking my grades seriously. I shook back like a bad bih does, but that was unnecessary drama and stress I put on myself. Also once you reach so many credits, your GPA moves like a snail. Unless you making 4.0's that thing is going to creep up. Seriously. Now I will say on the flipside some people can turn up every day and make excellent grades. I had friends who were party promoters and were literally the scene itself. And was on the dean's list faithfully you hear me. But that aint me. I have to immerse myself in my studies, pull all-nighters, drink energy drinks... and that is okay with me because my end result will be good. So know yourself. And really develop good study habits and methods. Have fun, but make sure them grades looking sexy. If you struggling, you going to have to miss out on some parties and gatherings. But that is okay. The struggle is temporary, but that GPA is forever chile. FOREVER. And even if you have to pull a comeback as so many of have done, OWN that comeback. Do what you got to do. Make that degree, don't let it make you... (Even though my degree is making me.)
5) Utilize the tutoring and TRIO departments: College is difficult as it is, so as much extra help as you can get... GET IT! I struggled with Math and Stat soooo bad. And tutoring helped me for the most part. And like I said, college cost so much money you might as utilize the free resources. Somewhere down the line we equated tutoring with being dumb, but that's not the case. It's DUMB, to be struggling and not reach out for help because of your pride. So look, if you need help go get some tutoring. If your teacher is having extra sessions please go to them. I took a hard psychological measurements stat class this summer, and guess who was in tutoring Wednesday and Friday. We are adults, which is means you got to do what is best for you. Your potna might be a fool at math or chemistry, but yo potna can't take your test for you. And cheating low-key like gambling in college, so hey the choice is yours
6) Be friendly, but choose your friends wisely: College is really where you will meet some people who will stick closer to you than you high school friends. Like I'm telling you I have met at least three of my bridesmaids. But college is kind of like high school, you go through the motions of seeing who your friends are and who aren't. Just because you are on a bigger campus with more people, doesn't mean fake people are just going to disappear. Like when I came into school I met some of my closet friends at our orientation. And 60% of them I am still close with. But I had to realize who was real and who was fake. It's fun to have a big group of friends and to be able to go out with, but as you progress you will quickly see quality is better than quantity. It's better to have a few good men on your side than a huge group of "friends" you have to play ispy on. Personally I got tired of trying to interpret what I thought what Lah bre and them really meant. And why Tammy always was trying to play on me in front of dudes and try to embarrass me. Or why Leah was was trying to hook me up with somebody she was secretly tryna hit. That's too much on my mental. And I'm not ashamed to say I had to learn at least twice who my friends were. Almost foug...you know what that's another story for another post. Remember, that just like high school your friends are a reflection of you. Now I know a lot of have different friends and we be on different kicks. But I would never be ashamed to claim them. Don't be friends with ppl who you not going to look out for you either. They like being seen with you but don't really have your best interest at heart. It might seem small, but I hate seeing girls or dudes getting tore up in the club and those friends recording them or laughing at them. That's not cool at all. I could say a mouth full on that but just choose your friends wisely.
7) Be selfish: With your time, money, relationships... ALL THAT. I am really a NICE person and sometimes struggle with saying no. They will have so much going on in college. Man my freshmen year there was something to do literally every day. And on the days I wanted to recover, somebody was inviting to the next wave. Whole time I needed to be waving my butt to sleep or in my books. The beginning of my college career I was steady putting others before myself. But you always got to remember, if the situation was flipped the other person would be looking out for themselves or quickly tell you they aren't available. So do the same. Really what and who you want to invest your energy. Learn how to say no, you not missing out. My mama always say you not missing out on nothing when you getting your life together. And remember you have to have time to yourself to reflect and recharge, because what can you give when have nothing?
8) Keep yo heart 3 stacks: I just hate how the media portrayed college being the place where you fall in love and this false betrayal of love. LMFAO welcome to the real world sucker. Now I'm not saying you won't find your significant other in college. You very well might. But I would not be surprised if you do not. Don't come in here thinking that you about to boo'd up no Ella Mai. Like I said you might but I doubt it. College dating or messing or whatever you want to classify it as is so different from the childish high school relationships you thought you had. You might have a boo who you go to class with, work out with, eat lunch in the cafe with, but he might also be messing with a girl who live in his dorm. And guess what you might not even see it coming. And it’s not just dudes. I knew sooo many girls who were single in college and had boyfriends as SOON as a break hit. But they'd joce a dude to fulfill what their home boyfriend is lacking. So don't be deceived, this is not Stomp the Yard or any other televised depiction of college love. And you can't get in your feelings about being feeling played or the one who you thought was the one ... when you actually being their like 4 on their list. Think about it like this, college is like going to an all you can eat buffet. Like a Harrah's or seafood one. So many crab legs, fried chicken, dipping sauces, and so many forbidden fruits. That how dudes and girls see their potential prospect options. They've not been around this many fine dudes/ girls in one area. So they can't really help themselves, so they might just want a crab leg, some shrimp, and a salad. And sis ranch dressing might not be as good as the caesar dressing over there. And my dude, your crab leg might not have as much... yall get my drift huh? My point is, let all that just kind of happen, don't be your end goal of college be having a boyfriend/ girlfriend. Its fun to explore your options and see what you like but don't let the center of your college experience. Again to each his own, but just know everybody will be on their own little mission. Don't let no dude or girl stress you out, because it happens. My friend was calling me so much over a dude who wasn't mine, having me pop up looking like boo boo the BIGGEST fool... then I had to realize, this isn’t it sis. That turned out to be three year toxic stage. Have fun and don't take the whole love aspect so seriously. Get your feet wet. A lot of people will be getting things out of their system for years and won't look to settle down till their last couple of years. If that's not what you want that is okay, some people know what they want and won't budge till they get it. But don't be expecting a relationship from lil Derrick if you know he not with that yet. And don't be expecting Keisha to be just for you if you know well and well how she get down. You are literally just disappointing yourself.
9) Bless up: Build up your resume. Make a new email address that is business appropriate. Make a LinkedIn. Get a church home. Get a mentor who is has taken a path you are trying to take. College is really fun and great part of life to experience. It also gets dark and scary. You fail and succeed. You fall in and out of relationships. You experience toxicity in all aspects. Depressions creeps upon you out of nowhere. How can you combat that? Well I am a religious person and I can say my relationship with God has been the biggest plus thus far. It has helped reenter myself every single time I fell off. I also have two mentors who I can call whenever I need help with school or just my personal life. You really want ppl in your life who are rooting for you and want to see you succeed. You can find those ppl in a local church and more importantly if you pray hard enough God will place good ppl in your path that will help fulfill his blessings to you. And this isn't a myth, I only talk about things I have experienced. I can truly say that everyone I have in my life right now has been a blessing to me and really want to see me succeed and shine. Keep your mental and spirit in tack, because those are the very crucial parts of you. Tupac really said it best when he said, "Dying inside, but outside you looking fierce."... Don’t be that person. Love you and really check on you. Have good supportive people in your life, because none of us can do life alone let alone college.
10) HAVE FUN WITH IT: I know I've brought up so many important tips but remember to have fun. So many people are such a stick in the mud and so serious they never truly experience college. I'm not telling you to be wild child and do everything. But do something. Find your mix. Find cool food spots, hangouts, and new hobbies. Make traditions with your friends. Take those unforgettable food runs or make those crazy pop ups you'll never stop talking about. Sure college is ultimately about securing your degree, but don't forget to smell the flowers. You will hit speed bumps and road blocks, but all of them will be a color in your beautiful portrait that this experience will create for you.
That's all of my tips for now. I got 10 more up my sleeve for next week. Until then, read and share these tips. If they can help one person that will make me happy. And if you have questions or any topics I can address... let me know I won't hesitate to answer.
xoxxoxxoxoxoxoxox- SeauxRaven
Part two
Hello beautiful people! Welcome back to SeauxRaven's Tips and Hacks for Surviving and Thriving College. I really wanted to drop part two last week but WOW, my first week was a mess. The very first day of school I lost my keys. So, I did not make it to my first class of the day and had to get a friend to come pick me up. Then I was working like a dog the first week and ended up finding the bad cough I had was BRONCHITIS! For those of you who have never had bronchitis please know it is a very unpleasant experience. Or maybe I am extremely dramatic. Let's go with both. The next week, I planned my University's annual block party and let me tell you I faced road blocks like no other. But I survived! Now I am trying to thrive lol. Just when I thought the struggle couldn't get any worse, I got some great news. About a month ago, I applied for an internship for a blog that would give me the exposure I've literally been praying for. It honestly took a lot out of me to even apply, but I did. I thought this was long shot because of the. But just like God does, he did ! I am now a part of this team, and as go I further into blogging this month I will tell you all much more. However, I shared that because it ties into the tip I gave previously! Go for your dreams and pull up a seat at the tables you long be at! Will Smith profoundly said, "On the other side of your maximum fear all of the best things in life." That being said. here are my last 10 tips! I hope these stick with you!
11)Set your pace: Now I don't want you to think I am telling you all to be lazy! That is not the message I want to convey. However, I do want you to take your time and set your OWN pace. In every aspect... whether it be school, learning yourself, advancing in a job.. SET YOUR PACE. I think the biggest mistake we make as humans is worrying about the next human. You have to be so focused and immersed in your journey that the advancement of the next person does not have any effect on your life. I'm not telling you to not be happy for others and celebrate others' accomplishments. Please do that, because positivity and good vibes help the heart thrive (you see what I did there). BUT, don't get so caught up with what others are doing that you lose sight of your voyage. Your purpose. Don't compare what you are doing to what the next person has happening. You will never be happy. Staying in your own lane and minding your business is ESSENTIAL and FUNDAMENTAL when watering yourself. So if you are nursing student waiting to get into nursing school, set your pace and don't be ashamed. If you are 6th year senior and all of your friends have graduated.. rest assured that God has you exactly where he wants you to be. Does God want us to fail? I don't think that. But I do believe he allows certain things to happen to us so we can trust him even more. I will tell y'all here on this blog I took summer school classes every summer and STILL am graduating a semester after my anticipated graduation date. I repeated statistics THREE times. And you can call me boo boo the fool too, but it's all good. God knew I'd have to take another level of statistics and I passed that class the first go around (I would be upset if I didn't, considering how many times I took the precedent). If I would've graduated in the Spring I wouldn't have been the VP of my organization, and I wouldn't have become as mentally strong as that disappointment made me. So many great things happen to me beginning Summer 2018 and I literally owe it to God and realizing my destination is my own. The great thing about setting your own pace is that is yours. Other than God, you are the author so you can do your own thing!
12)It takes some finesse: I don't want to give away some of good ole gems on finessing because I don't need anyone snitching on me before I get this degree -______-. But know I am QUEEN FINESSE. Please learn how to finesse. Please learn how to exaggerate sometimes if you get my drift. Please joce these teachers like they're your besties so when you need something they not looking at you with a question mark above their head. Learn how to scratch your neighbor back so they can scratch yours. You need people and people will need you. So, determine what you need, but what can you give in exchange. Example: I wanted to eat at this place on campus but didn't want to pay out of pocket because I don't have a meal plan. What can I give? :) I can give this person a shirt every time I have an even. Consequently, I never really pay for food anymore. Work the system dude. Again, I'm not giving y'all my scam stories cause, I don't need any of this falling back on me, just finesse the system so you don't have to work like a dog. Work smarter, not harder
13)Meal Plans: Short and sweet. If you are planning on getting a meal plan, please buy the one with the least cafeteria swipes. Unless you just love Sodexo, I guarantee you will not ever want 12 swipes a week. Please choose the meal plan that has the most declining balance so you can have it your way like BK. Also to the young's, don't let the older students finesse you out of your swipes. I don't care how cute he is sis, he just hungry and can smell the milk fresh on your breath. You’re a clueless freshman who don't know better. Same thing for you young dudes. That older girl does not think you that mature, she just hungry and don't get paid till Thursday!
14)Push yourself: I just help to keep reiterating this because this is fundamental. If I didn't push myself throughout college IDK where I would be. Life is full of disappointments, but it’s all about the comeback baby. You got to have a fire in you. Don't just let life happen to you. Keep swinging. Stay in the game, don't let it take you out. Take your L's in silence, cry if you need to.. then suck it up and keep it moving. I always say I am not only the sum total of all of the people who have impacted me.. but I am also the sum-total of my mistakes. God will bless mess if you allow him too. And I was a mess in 2016 JESUS CHRIST. That was the worst year of my life you hear me. Had the best semester in the Spring, just to have school kick me in my face in the fall. Got in a bad wreck, got played by a guy (in silence though, that's the key), got about 5 tickets, I'm not going to lie to you the list could go on. But after that long depressing year, I vowed that I would handle 2017 and 2018 with grace. And I did just that. I cried and complained, then I realized who was in control. Moral of the story.. don't ever count yourself out. You got to push yourself so you can finish this race.
15)Go to school for you: Don't major in biology because your parents want you to be a doctor. You’re failing these bio classes but your parents are happy because they can tell people you are future doctor. "No."- Rosa Parks. Thankfully, my parents truly endorsed the, "You can be anything you want to be," idea. Because me and my sister have really wanted to be everything you can name. But my parents really supported every dream and career. But everyone doesn't have that. Some of you who are reading this might be in school now chasing a career you hate because of pressure from family. Don't do it. Please be what YOU want to be. And when it comes to changing your major. Do it. A lot of people will say they'd never change their major because of the fear of staying in school longer. But would not it be great to make a sacrifice early on so you can do what you know you love. I'd rather change my major eight times (exaggerating a bit), than to be stuck with a degree in a field I hate, and ultimately not knowing how to utilize my degree.
16)Educate yourself: Just because you are in college, does not mean you will learn everything you need to know. There is so much I am just now learning as a senior that I should've known as a freshman. Also, your parents got you this far..now it's your turn. Some people come to college with very little support, and some are the complete opposite. Nevertheless, learn how to be self-sufficient. I met a dude who didn't know how to wash close, and wow that is sad. I want you to educate yourself in every aspect. Learn what loans you have and what kind of aid exists. Don't just rely solely on the staff. Look for scholarships in your department. Find the half-priced bookstores in your area. That job you're working on the side, find out the medical benefits that could be useful while you're in school. Learn the retention rate at your school and how you can combat failure.
17) Protect yourself. Y'all it is very scary how STD's go around on college campuses. Now like my mama say the best way to prevent any of that is to not have sex. But.... please protect yourselves. You can go to the clinic on most campuses for FREE if you are full time student and get almost any service done for free. A lot of men carry diseases and will not know as rapidly as the signs show in women. You better wrap it up, it aint that serious to risk getting who knows what. Better safe than sorry. Sexually transmitted diseases can cause women to become sterile if they are not contained and treated in a timely manner. Speak up and inquire about your partner's status. If you are going to be sharing your body with someone you have the right to ask about their health and what they might be doing in their free time.
18)Make that money but don't let it make you: College is about balance. Money is essential for everyday life, but money isn't everything. Don't get caught up with a demanding job while in college, because that degree is the main-focus. The degree will aid you in securing the bag. I began working my junior year, and it was a lot and I wasn't even getting paid a lot. So, if you're going to work like a dog while in college, weigh the benefits! And don't get a big paying job and get so blinded by the money you don't think you need school. It is easy to lose sight of the big picture when there are distractions are in the way. Money is seductive and a drug. Remember your goals and why you came to college in the first place. Weigh it out. If you are going to get a job, make sure it beneficial and will aid you throughout your college journey.
19)Organize: A wise man once said if you don't plan, then you plan to fail. I want y'all to feel that because that it is the truth. Planning can make your life so much smoother. It helps reduce anxiety provoking situations as well. Life is a rollercoaster, but if you plan it can be a rollercoaster with an itinerary! Organize though flashcards. Write down when you need to study and what days you plan to work out. Get a planner and copy all the dates from your syllabi from it. When there is a big week coming up I write out everything. This way I can actually see what is in front of me and have a handle on it. Look up techniques and methods of successful college students. Literally you always come across the implementation of organization!
20) Sleep: That simple. That is my number one self-care rule. Ask my friends, if I don't know how to anything I can sleep. For hours at that. Rest! I told you all previously that is so important to reset yourself for the next day and weeks to come. Sleep when you can because the lack of sleep can really trigger health problems.
Thank you so much for reading my spill and last set of tips. If you don't get anything, please remember to love yourself and be patient. You will have a great college career. Art is not created overnight, and that is what you are. A work of fine art. Keep painting and perfecting the muse, and in due time it will be gorgeous. Have a great week guys! For this month's giveaway I will be raffling off two 25 dollar visa cards along with a few school supplies; there will be a girl and boy winner! The rules for this contest will be announced on September 8th celebrating the blog's four months. Make sure you subscribe, because it is imperative for this contest :) !
-xoxxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxo SeauxRaven
8/26/19
YEAH YEAH GUESS WHO IS BACK! SURVIVING AND THRIVING COLLEGE, I GOT THE HACKS!
1.) Get familiar with you counselor/ advisor. They can MAKE or BREAK your college career. Mine advisor made my college experience so much better. She was there for my many ups and downs and truly was a second mother. But let me snatch you from the fairy tale. This is not always the case. So you need to really get a feel for who it is determining when you graduate. I've witnessed some advisors mess over students bad, I wanted my round for the benefit of them. You don't have to be stuck in that predicament. You can more than likely request another advisor if your concern is legitimate. Don't expect a warm and fuzzy experience from them, but remember they should be GUIDING you towards graduation and not be clueless.
2) Do research. This is for all of my majors that this is applicable too. This will really distinguish you from other students and set you up for the real world. Travel abroad. These things look great on your resume, but they will allow you to see the world and your area of study so much deeper. This is my only regret from undergrad.
3) Get a MENTOR. I keep saying this, and this is a not new tip. You need a mentor to help you and help you understand your projected field.
4) Don't ride the wave, create you own. College is all about meeting new people, but for me it helped me embrace ME. My interests, my time, my friends. It can be so hard in college trying to find yourself. There will be so many opportunities to blend in with the crowd, so how about not. Be an original. In everything you do. Do things because you think they're cool or beneficial. I can honestly say me and my friends truly stayed in our lanes. We did our partying, but we created our own fun among ourselves. Remember it is always cheaper to be yourself.
5) Figure out your final exams in the beginning of the semester. You'd hate to have 4 important exams on a Friday and can't do anything to change it because you just figured this out a week ago. Because I promise you, from experience.. the department will be just as clueless as you. What will you do?
6) Always Work smarter rather than harder. Schedule your classes on MWF, or TH.. if you can! Make a sacrifice and take that early class so you can have some down time in the middle of the week instead of going to class every single day. That is GHETTO.
xoxoxxoxox- SeauxRaven