I'm no health professional or psychologist(yet), but here are some of my key gems for keeping a good mental. I get stressed out like the next, but these steps help me refocus from time to time. Ultimately, self care is essential.
1) Isolate and then migrate: I’m a highly engaged person. I’m very involved in school as I’ve mentioned before and I like to hang with my friends a lot. But sometimes I have to take a step back and reenter myself. I go into isolation. I go MIA for a day or two as far as interaction, and recharge. Contrary to what you have heard, nothing is wrong with this. Some of us are afraid to do this because we are afraid to be alone, but that’s another story. I find when I properly isolate myself and recharge, I’m able to understand myself more. I start understanding what got me to this point, and what I need to do not get here again. Sometimes I will absolutely do nothing. I’ll sleep the entire day and answer no one’s messages. This sounds extreme, but I take my sanity very seriously. And like my mom always tells me, if I get sick or die tomorrow, the world will still keep going. All of the people who I try to be ever present for will continue their lives. With that being said here are some of my relaxation methods more detailed?
2) A simple bath: I think baths are much underrated. Baths are for men and women by the way, for any of you reading this with fragile masculinity. I really used to hate taking baths, because I couldn’t sit still that long. But now I make myself take a bath once or twice a week. And it makes a huge difference. Spice it up too. The aromatherapy candles are cool, but there’s nothing wrong with copping a Walmart one. Turn all the lights off and light your candle up. Then proceed to RELAX. Stay in the tub until you feel wrinkly. Read a book, scroll your TL, deep condition your hair, anything pertaining to self-care. Which leads me to my next point.
3) Facial Care: There’s nothing like good ole facial mask. You don’t have to buy the very expensive exfoliating ones either. The Freeman masks which can be found literally everywhere are very cheap. If you go to Walgreens, they are normally 2 for 3 dollars. And tip, you don’t have the use the mask in one day. You should be able to use the mask at least 3 days, unless your head is extremely big. I also recommend the African Black Clarifying Mud Mask by Shea Moisture. It is more on the expensive side, but is a true investment. Literally the best exfoliating experience ever. Btw, you exfoliate according to your skin type. For example I have combination skin (oily and dry), so I exfoliate 2-3 times a week. Based on my research this applies to those with normal skin type as well. If you have sensitive skin I’d try it just once a week. Disclaimer: just because this works for my skin does not mean it’ll work for yours. Remember also when doing your skin care routine: exfoliate, cleanse, and then moisturize. I feel if you exfoliate first you’re purifying and getting rid of all that dead skin.
4)Read a book. I know people are into appearing extremely deep and reading these self-help or wealth endorsing books. But if that’s not your thing, get a mystery book. Or any genre you want. I personally like a variety of books. I normally will have a have a self-help, spiritual, or fictional book in rotation. Reading is good for the soul in my opinion. But again this might not be for everybody. I tried to take my friends to Books a Million and they were reading the food magazines💀. They also think I’m a nerd, lol. A timeless self-help book is “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.” I’m currently reading one fiction book that’s really juicy, so when I’m done with that I will make a least of good reads.
5) Talk about it: As social as I am, I do not like talking about my problems. I mean I pray a lot but I want to voice my issues you know? I don’t think it’s healthy to let things build up and then explode on your friends. So I’d recommend talking to certain friends. Now I know it’d be ideal to be able talk to any of your friends about your problems. But realize every friend is different and doesn’t have the same intellect or reasoning you do. I know everyone says to hang around like minded people, but everyone in your clique is slightly on a different kick. When you realize this, you’ll stop venting in vein. Some people don’t have the mental capacity to understand or help you to through your problems. So simply pinpoint the friend(s) who can. Express your emotions to your friend who will actually listen instead of making you feel crazy. But you don’t want a yes man either. Talk to someone who will give you critical feedback. I love all of my friends, but there are three particularly I know I can talk to when I’m at my lowest. Pinpoint your three, and if it’s more than that, great.
6) Be present: I took a meditation class last fall and it literally brought my dramatics down at least 5 notches. And if you know me, that is a lot. Anyway, I’m a psych major so I really am into a person’s psyche and everything that creates that space. So I start with myself and focus on the components of my psyche, like what makes me who I am mentally. And when you are in sync with this it helps you operate better. Being present means to be aware of yourself internally and externally. It also means living in the moment and not worrying about the next day. This is hard, but if you can do this, you’ll alleviate a lot of stress. My teacher would guide us through different domains such as family, community, friends, love, and etc. We would pinpoint our strengths and weaknesses in these areas. Then we would think about what we could change and what we did well with. Ultimately we focused on gratitude. Being content but not complacent.
So I guess I wrote this piece for those who get really stressed like me. Those who have a lot going on in their schema and need a bit of advice. All these things are common knowledge and might seem simple, but they might help someone.
Xoxoxoxoxo -SeauxRaven